Fine Tuning
Are you fine tuning people to no effect?
I am seeing this pattern in people. You say something and they add a comment. It’s not even a clarification. It’s what I call fine tuning.
Was something added to the conversation? Maybe. One could argue it’s continuing the conversation. Does it add value to the conversation? Maybe. Yes, I know I kind of double stated the question.
A recent conversation came to mind. I bought a house and someone added I paid 20K to much for a house that cost several hundred thousand dollars. Really? It does not matter what I paid, you’d say something like that.
Or you buy a car. You paid a thousand too much for a car that costs tens of thousands. Doesn’t matter what I paid then, does it? You’d fine tune me.
You go on a ten day vacation and you are told you should have gone for twelve days. Whatevs.
You work all weekend on a critical project and the manager asks if you did something that to you is rather innocuous. Just damn.
Funny thing is a lot of people do this but I find myself thinking of one person in particular, who made me aware of this concept with the constant fine tuning.
Now that I’ve recognized this fine tuning I can more purposefully respond. I either add that it’s what I wanted to do so it does not matter or I’ll change the conversation. Or I’ll say that is not something that matters.
If I see that you are just busting my chops, I am kind of good with that.
I’m not drawing some grand conclusion here. I’m writing this to hope someone becomes aware they are doing this or others are doing to them.
I have met someone who does a good job of spinning something I say with a more positive way of looking at what I just said. I am good with that. He has me thinking a bit differently.
Have a great day.
Come back for more perhaps silly observations I have.
God bless.
